Wednesday 29 August 2012

the importance of working with volunteers



Volunteers are the backbone of any organization. They often assist with administration and certain physical jobs. Volunteers are often motivated by three reasons to becoming volunteers which are to contribute to a good cause, they also volunteer with the hope of developing new skill or gain experience and meeting new people.
Even though volunteers offer their services without monetary compensation or even without the qualification or experience that most permanent staff have in the organization they still require recruitment, training, management and supervision just like the paid staff.  In many cases volunteers often feel violated and sidelined by the paid staff.
Most volunteers feel sidelined and walked over by paid staff, this conflict is caused by feeling of fear and from the paid staff. The paid staff fears that the volunteers will take their jobs or are sometimes are getting more attention than they are which then in turn the paid staff excludes the volunteers and often harass and bully the volunteers.
Volunteers take their time to offer their services for free; they commit themselves to assisting in the success of the organization. It would really be nice if people in big companies and successful organizations could start treating volunteers with respect and as equals. It's important to remember that if someone has a bad experience with your organization, they may never again volunteer – for your group or others.
Volunteers are just as important !!!!

How to deal with stress


Do you ever feel like too much is expected from you, or that you are working way too many hours compared to others, you have less time to sleep, too many deadlines, you can not eat properly and you are always on the run from home to work and from work home. You are not alone. Everyone experiences at some point in their lives and others don’t even realize they are suffering from stress. Adults stress out, teens stress out and even kids also stress.
Fortunately there are ways to reduce the levels of tress that we experiences and ways to avoid stressing unnecessarily . Stress differs from person to person and even ways to handle stress differ. It is our bodies that help us deal with stressful situations, when you have a deadline and haven’t finished the task automatically you stress and our bodies are designed to deal with all situations that we find ourselves in so without realizing it the body tries to adjust to the current situation (pressure) to help you perform better and faster and that is called stress response, however , it is how a person reacts to stress response that we see signs of stress.
Dealing with stress also differs as stress levels also differ. The most important aspect of dealing with stress is getting enough sleep every night.  Our bodies experience demands from different situations, people or events which exhausts the body so giving it enough sleep is a way of releasing the pressure. Exercise, take a few minutes to jog, walk or even squats, there many different kinds of exercises that one could choose from to suite their body.  By doing that you, are boosting your mood and improving your lifestyle and productivity at home and at work.
Moreover, setting priorities is also very important because now you can easily work through your tasks without pressure as you will have enough  time to start with what’s important and not feel the pressure of deadlines and incomplete tasks. If priorities are set it also means that you can manage your time as well.
Communication is also very important because it helps relieve the stress.  Its best and is advised that when one feels stressed go and talk to someone, try and not talk to the people you work with everyday, find someone very close to you or someone you do not even know. It is much easier to open up to a stranger that the person you know. Other people do not really like talking so writing is also another tool for dealing with stress. Having a journal to make entries on everyday or simply writing on a piece of paper, writing is much easier because it has a sense of privacy as there will be no worries of people spilling the news or saying things about you behind your back, writing also great  because you can express yourself in anyway you want and no one will say anything back to you, so it is just you and your thoughts on paper.
Stress happens to everyone, it is all the daily things that we do that stress us. Even the little things that we take for granted can turn around and stress us. It now differs individually the levels of stress we experience and how we deal with it when we finally realize that we are indeed stressed. Stress does not have ages, it comes to teenagers, young adults, old age people and even little kids to stress but its just a matter of how we choose to deal with stress, hopefully the information shared with you will somehow help some of you who did not know how to deal with stress. 

Tuesday 28 August 2012

A little something for a special someone


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How long will I keep longing?

How warm is my fiery heart?
Will my love ever perish?
How long will darkness last?
How long will I keep fighting?
Will I ever grow too old?
Will my love ever perish
Will my heart grow cold?

As long as night turns to day
With the rising of the sun
Will my love keep burning?
Will my faith remain?
As the warmth of the spring
Chases winter away
I will be longing
I’ll be hoping
And my love will never die
Nor my love will never die!!!

Monday 20 August 2012

it is better to practice a little than to talk a lot

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There is a famous saying that goes: "Action speaks louder than words"this is a very difficult thing for us people to practice this. In most times people have very much to say but very little to do.

For instance sometimes someone would go to an interview and promise so much about themselves then when they are put to the challenge they have very little results to show, However it does not mean that one should not sell themselves to the potential employers. This just means one should try not to oversell or false market themselves with skills that they do not even have.
 
This can be applied in our general lives and communities. people spend a lot of time complaining about poor services and unemployment.  I understand that its not as easy as it is said but if people could just look around themselves and see if there isn't something they can do as a community to fight unemployment in their communities. start small by starting up community vegetable gardens or baking bread and selling it.

In essence "it is not what you say that determines how much you can do, but what you can can say more about you than your words" Tembakazi tessa Sineke.

Weeding cake in the middle of the road

she  was young, pure and kind. she was a girl in love. she was only 15 years old when she met him. he was her first. they were so in love everyone loved to just sit and watch them together. always holding hands when walking together, always giggling and smiling it was love. everyone believed it was love.

She fell pregnant during the last year of high school. It was really hard for her as she knew she wouldn't be able to go to prom with her friends as they had been planning all year. She was crushed at the worry of never going to college after graduation but whe she told him he was very support and excited about the baby. He promised her that they would get married and he would work while she studied part time and looked after the baby at home.

Everything went very well after she had given birth to a healthy beautiful baby boy.  at the beginning of the new year he had to go and find a job while she stayed home to look after the baby. they had panned to get married as soon as they had enough money saved up. The first few months went very well. The young couple spoke every day in the morning and night. the baby daddy sent money home every end of the month. It seemed like everything was in place.

The relationship was stronger. everything was amazing they even went ahead a planned the wedding they had been talking about. while busy with the wedding plans the young mother kept hearing news about her fiance seeing other women he was working with. he only came back home once a month as he was working far, she didn't know how to approach him as nothing had changed. She went ahead with the wedding plans ignoring all the romours about her husband to be.

On the week of the wedding, he ringed the apartment where they were staying "baby I can't come home for the whole week, the plant is very busy and I need to be here to assist the new employees, I'll just come home on Friday evening for the bachelor party with the boys". before she could say anything, had had to put the phone down.

.....Friday evening he still was nowhere to be found, hes phone was off. Now she was starting to worry about and wondered if the rumors were true, but then whenever the thoughts came to her she pushed them away because he had been so true to her for a long time, he wouldn't do anything to hurt her like this. she went to bed leaving the door unlocked in case he came home from the party with the boys. 03:00am she received a text "sorry baby my colleagues took me out for dinner to celebrate my wedding, I will be there very early in the morning, get my suit ready".

She got some kind of relief but the worry did not go away. no one knew what was going on, she kept telling everyone "everything is fine" 05:00am she gets a call from the local police "are you Ms Jenner?" with  a heavy voice she replied "yes I am, Its my wedding today I don't want any bad news, whats wrong?" the police" "I'm afraid I have some bad news, your boyfriend was found dead in his bed from overdose. He left a letter for you". "could you give us your address to bring the letter? ...mam?...Ms Jenner are you there?" Young Ms Jenner's heart had stopped beating when she heard the news. her body slowly slid down the wall from where she was standing...She never got to walk down the isle!









My high school sweetheart_Love at first sight (end)


I hated my stupid response. I didn’t believe what I had done. I stopped attending the Saturday classes because I could not even look him in the eye without hating myself.  One day on a Friday in my school I went and approached my friend Toto whom I had heard that he was from the same neighborhood as my dream guy. I asked Toto to walk me to his house that Friday. I bunked my classes and skipped fence just to go see him. When we got there Lela was home.  He was wearing a white vest and his gray pants. He had just got home from school. He smiled slightly when he saw my face behind his friend and I smiled back.  It was awkward with my being the third person in the rooms so I asked him to leave me behind, he joked about it and left.  I didn’t know what else to say as Lela was walking closer to me. All I could do was smile, “what are you doing here?” he asked. Before I even answered he continued to say, “I thought you didn’t want me though”, I couldn’t say anything. I had a huge ball of nothing blocking my throat. “ I am visiting my friend, is there something wrong with my being here” I asked.
At this moment there was silence in the house as we were the only one inside, there car that was parked next door had driven off so even the music that was playing had been gone. He was starring straight in my eyes, I couldn’t move away from them. As he drew closer I could smell his perfume, my heart was beating so fast. No one was saying anything; we were both walking towards each other looking each other straight in the eye. Finally our hands met, his skin was warm and soft while my hands were sweaty and shaking. He was still, he was very sure of himself. I liked that. He as very tall so he bent down his back so his face could meet my face, I wanted to take steps back but my body couldn’t let me. He was now even closer to me could I could feel his breath slightly on my face. I was looking at my lips and in my head I was think I they moist enough? Are thy pretty? Does he like them? Before I could even do anything I felt his soft lips on mine. It was beautiful. I had kissed my dream guy for the first time and I was very pleased. And from then we became the very best of friends. I knew I was in love with him Even today we still are best of friends.  I don’t know if other people believe in Love at first sight cause I do. It was love at first sight and we are still very much in love. Thanks to that bad weather and his jacket.
From 2006-2012 and still going strong! “ I had to share my story”

Friday 17 August 2012

my high school sweetheart_Love at first sight (part 2)


Oh I couldn’t stop looking at him, my body felt things it had never felt before. I wanted to stop myself from feeling that way but it was good, it was a good feeling and I could not control it. I knew it was love. I had fallen in love with a tall dark stranger.

Weeks later………… We had been registered that Saturday was our very first class.  I was in class sitting on the front desk when I saw the very same guy walking into my class; I froze with excitement when our eyes met.  He walked right straight to the empty sit next to me and sat. He officially introduced himself to me and we even exchanged numbers. Each week that went by made us closer because we spent time in class just chatting and writing silly notes to each other. Its funny because we were only just friends but a person who didn’t know that could have sworn we were more than friends.  We only attended the classes just so we could see each other and when we were in class we never used to listen, all we did was chat and not even participate in class activities.  The tutors and teachers used to call us John and Mary *laughs*.

One day when he finally me out, I was so excited and so happy that he finally did after making me wait for so long that I turned going out on a date with him down.  “No?” “OMG did I just turn the man of my dreams down?” `I could see the disappointment in his face that he was not going to ask me twice. I was so angry and disappointed in me. I had just pushed away a man I have been dreaming of since the day I first met him. I told my sister who knew how head over heels in love I was with this guy. she did not believe it. Who would believe it though?  I did not blame her. That was just about the dumbest thing I have ever done...

it is a poor idea to lie to yourself

I think lying is natural. in my books there is nothing wrong with telling a little white lie. I believe that it won't harm anyone. there problem is when people start telling big ugly lies or lying to themselves.

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I have made so many friends in my life and have been exposed to so many different lies. You know the saying about girls pretending to be friends while they are stabbing each other in the back? well lying has also been one of them. I know people who lie to themselves everyday.  Sometimes people lie to hide their situations or to defend themselves. but my problem with that is when one lies all the time  the mind slowly believe that lie and unknowingly the person stays believe that lie too.

Sometimes even in relationships people lie to themselves.  Some people get based by their partners. wen the first it happens for the first time its common that people moved past it as they think its not  going to happen again. Its after 3 times when people are still in the relationship do I think its lying to themselves. by then I would think they victims should know that the relationship is dangerous and there is no changing. But unfortunately the victims stay in the relationship telling themselves that its normal, its alright, He/she will change.

Now this when I think you can say to  a person they are lying to themselves when they stay in situations that they know are bad for them. others stay in these situations to prove a point to certain people and that is just lying to yourself because then outside you tell people that you are fine and then you end up telling yourself that your are also fine even though deep down you know that yu are not and to me that is lying to yourself

my high school sweetheart_Love at first sight (part 1)

my high school sweetheart

It was a cold Saturday morning in long queue of students from different schools around Cape Town for extra lessons. I had missed the weather the previous night so I hadn’t dressed for that cold windy day. While standing in that long chaotic queue with students pushing around wanting to be first on the line, I spotted my schoolmate (we will call him Toto).   He was dressed warmly and had another jacket in his hands. I called on him, waving from within the crowd pushing around for him to see. He spotted me and immediately rushed to my direction.
He was laughing at me, asking me why was I not wearing a jersey in that weather. I did not respond because I had been like an idiot since I arrive at that institution, as everyone was so warm and cozy.  I went for the jacket he was carrying in his hands. Quickly put it on and joke “ I knew you would bring something for me my friend”.  Before he returned to his spot at the back of the line he told me the jacket was not his and pointed at a tall, dark guy (we will call him Lela) who was standing where my friend was. He was handsome; I could move my eyes from him, for a while I starred at him appreciating every part of his body just by looking at him. “Uhmmm” my friend interrupted me, he said that guy you looking at is the owner of this jacket and he had just asked him to hold it for him.
I told my friend that I was not taking the jacket off, I was only beginning to get warm and I will die if I take it off now, so we agreed that if his friend wanted the jacket back he would come ask for it.  It did not even take 30 minutes after my friend had gone back to his pot when his friend Lela came asking who was wearing his jacket.  At this point he was so close me I could feel his warmth, I was shaking, smiling and scared at the same time.  He was not moving; he stood there so tall, dark with beautiful big bright eyes. He had the biggest beautiful smile I had ever seen; I had never felt like that for anyone before. I kept creating images of his body in my head; I didn’t even hear him when he asked for my name.  “ Sorry if you going to be wearing my jacket at least I have to know you name” he said.  “Tessa, Uhmmmm Tessa is my name sorry I didn’t hear you the first time, its very noisy here”, I replied.

Human trafficking trending in our societies

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http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/stop-human-trafficking


South Africa is a hotbed for the billion dollar human trafficking industry. Everyday people are reported missing, even little kids who are less then 10 years old are being abducted from their families. 
We live in a society where rich people become richer and poor people are becoming poorer everyday. We have young girls and women who leave their homes and families to go the cities to look for jobs to support their families. Rural people are also targets of these gruesome acts, where these rich people who promise them jobs lure them into the city and promise them fancy lives.
When they get to the city the y are drugged and beaten up and beaten up forced to do things they are not comfortable with.  They take their clothes and all their belongings and then take naked pictures of the victims which are then used to blackmail them when they are force them to work as drug dealers and prostitutes.
The victims consider themselves very lucky when they do get out of the situation safely because 80% of the time once they get into that there is no turning back.  Most of the time they get addicted to drugs and commit crimes and the trafficker force them to stay with them.  Even they do find a chance to safely escape most of them return to the streets because they are so drawn away from society and believe the best place for the is the streets.
This ugly, sick activity is not only practiced by foreign people as most people say but local citizens have a hand too. By not reporting suspicious practices in our neighborhoods we are supporting these acts. Lets work together to create a safe society for everyone. Lets all stand together against Human Trafficking!!!

Wednesday 15 August 2012

the sound of one hand clapping


Zen Koan
When I could not put my pen on paper about this one I decided to do a little research about it and find out what other people have to say about the sound of one hand clapping. from all the reading I did (about the Zen Koan) I had a wonderful experience of spiritual growth. 

“Normally, we are so preoccupied with the events in our life that we leave little space to explore our inner world. We try to solve problems with our rational mind and only once in a while stumble upon a clarity that seems to come from a level of understanding different from and beyond our normal thinking. In traditional Zen, a disciple is given a Koan, a riddle that cannot be solved by the rational mind. ‘What is the sound of one hand clapping?’ After many attempts, the disciple experiences the answer as a clear reflection of the truth: and with it comes a realization that all answers come from within oneself”. (The Zero Experience: Zen Koans)

In my understanding the sound of one hand clapping could be you ability to enjoy the company you keep with yourself and Its about being able to look for your own answers “you must find it yourself, and not in your mind, and not in the comfort of a rational response.  Once experienced, the answer is often a life changing experience, and needs no confirmation from anyone else. (Zen Koans)


if you could go back what would you change

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Not that I do not appreciate the present and my blessings but I sometimes find myself wishing I could turn the hands of time and go back before the apartheid times. I wish I could get a change the way people look at each other.

 I wish I could go back and change how the color of one’s skin became a problem.  Reverse the pain and sorrow humanity endured for being born in their skin colors. I wish I could go back and change all the ugly memories of the apartheid and inequality era.

 I would like to go back and change the trauma of complexion a lot of people have experienced. I would erase it all. I would erase how women are judged based on their gender.

 All I wish for is to go back and change what the older generation did wrong the present would not be this blurry for me and the next person like. 

not all who wander are lost


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This makes me think of growing up as a teenager not knowing where you are going or where you come from. It makes me think of a self-discovery process.

As we grow up we get very motivated, eager to follow our dreams, and to get a start on life. Yet we are also very unsure of a lot of things. We are afraid of commitment, struggling with our beliefs, and with no real sense of what really matters in life.

With all these changes in our lives we turn to forget our purposes and focus on less important thing like impressing our friends or making our parents or spouses happy.

I believe that all these stages and processes we come across in our lives are important in making our journey and us who we are to self-discovery. In this journey we learn so much more about ourselves but in that moment it does not feel like we do. It’s when a life changing experience comes do we realize how important our journey is.

Its when we think we have no where to go when we actually discover how we truly know who we are. We all have different life changing experiences though; some could be very happy and exciting times or some very sad and painful times. It is how we deal with them when we discover how important the journey to our self-development journey is.

We do not all have to take the same direction, no one knows where our destiny is, what ever journey you are traveling on take everything you learn as leading to the right direction, in the end we will all reach our destinations.

So in your journey when you feel alone, lost and in the dark, try to think of where you started your journey, remember which direction you are headed. For every journey there is a destination and what ever you find was meant for you and will add value when you continue to walk.


Remember : “Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.” and your campus for your destination.
― Aristotle

how do you step from a 100-foot pole?


How I step from a 100-foot pole is by waking up each day with all my problems and still manages to make something out of that day. I take risks to make sure that, dreams do come true.
With all the problems and difficulties I am faced with I still find the courage and strength to follow my dreams. It is my strength and faith that allows me to still stand in the centre of the fire and shout to the silver moon “I have a dream”.
 I am stepping from a 100-foot pole everyday when I wake each morning to go to work and still find the courage to go to school after work in hopes of obtaining a Btech in my profession.  It is the courage to go to bed everyday and dream about a brighter future, a future better than the one my parents had.
Stepping from a 100-foot pole is the strength and courage I have to even dare to be different and make change even though there is no guarantee of success.  My stepping from a 100-foot pole goes along with my faith, my belief that if you dare to dream you can change your future. It goes hand in hand with hard work and dedication. It goes with working damn hard to make a difference.


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How do I step from a 100-foot pole? I dare to be different,  I follow no leads but  I follow my dreams!!!

In celebration of Africa day "MY clans"


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NdiliBhele,
uDlambulo, uKhuboni,
uQunta, uMafu,
uLanga, uMnomana,
uMbutho, uNcwana,
unoNtanda, unoMbikazi,
uNdabezitha, uMadiba-ndlela.
Xa ndizithutha ndityenenez’ umendo oya koobawomkhulu:
SingamaBhel’ akuloKhuboni.
Iint’ ezinqul’ uLanga.
OonoNtanda kuphakanyiswa,
OonoMbikazi ngob’ umnt’ ongxathu akalahlwa,
usengel’ abantwana xa likhithika.
Iint’ ezidiba de zidibe nendlela.
Iint’ ezimpundu zinge zingangiwa.
Ingab’ asilo Bhele elo, makwedini,
kuba laphekwa nelitye,
lavuthwa ilitye lasal’ iBhele.
Nditsh’ abadl’ isikhwebu sakwamkhwekazi,
kwaNoqambulo.
Inyath’ eyasind’ abazingeli sebeyosele.
Iint’ ezingawudliy’ umbilini wenkomo,
zidl’ owenyamakazi.
Awu! Awu! Ndenqen’ ukulisuka ngamandl’ eli thwathwa,
ngoba hleze libe daphudaphu, makwedini!
Kunjalo ke mabandlandini amnyama !!!